Dandelion Puffs

dus10 asked: Did you know that I love you, and I want to spend my life forever with you???? True story!!! :P

Did you know that I love you more then life. =] 

Hopefully going on a date tonight.

I’m really looking forward to it. :) gonna hang out with my baby and give him some lovin. :) he’s been treating me extra amazing the past couple days and I want to repay him. :) he reminded me of some of the things that I wrote previously on here and made me cry the other night cause he was being so sweet. I defiantly have the right guy. :)

I miss my baby tonight something awful.

I can’t say anything cause it’s not his fault and I know he misses me too…. So to keep up with things i want to tell him throughout this week I’m gonna write them here.

• Mom let me buy 3 pairs of shorts today. can you believe it? xD
• I’m so happy you’re having fun but I miss talking to you like crazy. You’re the only person I can talk to and not have to censor myself. I can tell you anything and you won’t care and wont judge.
• I made pumpkin bread tonight. I can’t wait to make some for you soon. :)
• And I ate cheese grits. We need to have those soon. ^_^
• I went to the pink heals tour today at the mall and got my face painted and go these knee high socks that are pretty cool. ^_^
• I rode with dad on the bike for the first time today. It’s nice but I don’t like it as much…..It feels too big and fancy for my taste. I’m actually thinking I might get my bike license soon just to have it. It might be cool who knows?
• I can’t wait till we get older and you can get a bike of your own. :) I’ll ride behind you all the time. ^_^ 
• I’m going to go get a mani/pedi with mom tomorrow to get ready for the trip. I’ll take pictures and possibly send them to you.
• I want to hear if you and matt are going through with your plan. xD just thinking about it makes me laugh. you guys are loons.
• I love your hoodie. :) It makes me smile. and so does your ring. :D
• I love you more then anything. :) 

Love

Your baby. =] ♥♥♥♥♥

I feel kinda like you’re drifting away and I don’t know what to do to get us back like we were. It’s nothing we’re doing or stopped doing it’s just that when I’m with you we seem SO together and so in sync. but when we’re apart, during the day especially, it’s hard for me because you feel so far away…..

I miss you.

Today stunk.

Yesterdy was amazing! In everyway….but today sucks. I wanna go to bed. I miss my baby…..

I’m such a stupid girl.

My mom….. -_-

My mom and I don’t get along. Even more right now. I’m really trying not to let my temper out but it’s SO hard. =[

So apparently

Dustin Called me last night at like 1:30 to apologize for falling asleep before he could say good night. He left a message. So what did I do?? I went and checked the message AND called him back. But the catch is I DON’T REMEMBER ANY OF IT!!! :( :( :( :( :( 

I feel so bad. So I woke up this morning and he usually calls me and instead I was so hoarse I had to tell him not to call cause he probably wouldn’t have understood me. 

=[ 

So now I get to wait until AFTER school to talk to him. :( I Hate the school year. I’m so over all my friends being in school all day. 

Tonight at bible study….

We talked about if God was at the center of your life and the center of your relationship….

Is it bad that I didn’t even know what to answer? I don’t exactly feel like I know where God is. Like I know what he’s trying to tell me. I feel these short bursts of “God moments” but then I feel nothing most the time. I don’t get it. I used to be so close to him. 

During the concert the other day I REALLY worshiped. I REALLY felt like I could feel him. and then it was gone. as quick as it came. 

I know I’ll probably get some truth and have some good worship at Revolve next weekend, but will something actually click? I don’t know. I don’t even know who God is anymore.

Well I know ABOUT who he is. I know all the facts and figures. I’ve been taught them all my life. I’ve been taught things over and over. But there’s a road block all of a sudden and I don’t know exactly where it lies. 

Well part of me DOES know where it lies…..but there’s this battle between my flesh and my spirit. my spirit wants to get closer to God and cut those things out. But my flesh keeps wanting those things. Keeps rebelling. I’ve developed a need to rebel and my spirit is crying out against it. I don’t know what to do about it. How can I be wild and fun and still be Godly? How can I be on fire for God and tough lives but still have a fun style.

So many questions….